I really do feel like I crave the Word of God.  I desperately want to understand what I’m reading when I read my bible.  But sometimes I just feel like the biggest idiot.  Like what did I just read…my comprehension is lacking something fierce..or so it seems.  I use different biblical interpretations on my phone to assist with a clearer meaning.  Lets face it, KJV doesn’t feel like my friend most days, IJS.  I do tend to prefer the NKJV, NIV and Amplified.  But when I just really want the nitty gritty, I have turned to the Message version.  I know that it’s ultimately up to the Holy Spirit to open up my understanding of the Word but it gets very frustrating at times.

So, in my quest to know more of Gods Word, to understand it and apply it to my life, I need Holy Spirits help.  I just can not do it on my own.  No matter how I try or look to other versions, at the end of the day I have to pray and say, “Lord, What does all this mean?”  The good thing about that prayer is the answer comes.  The more I seek God for my daily reading plan the less frustrated I feel and the more I understand what I’m reading.  You see no bible reading plan can guide me better than the one Holy Spirit provides.  I feel less frustrated and intimidated because I know He is leading me where He wants me to go thus giving me insight and understanding.

I’m trying to stop putting so much pressure on myself to get everything done.  I don’t have to read every book of the bible right now.  I don’t have to know my concordance front to back.  I don’t have to read every inspirational/devotional email, pamphlet or book I come across.  I believe I give myself information overload…receiving too much then not knowing what to do with it…just information not knowledge.

So, 2019 is my year to slow down and speed up.  Slow down in the things of Carmen and speed up my obedience to the things of God,  even in reading my bible.  I believe I’ll be the better for it.  Thirsty for the Word but led by God!

Peace and Blessings to you until next time!!!


Happy New Year 2019….setting God-goals

Well it’s been a while but I’m back.  Its a new year but the clock on my life doesn’t just start over with the new year.  What I learned and went through in 2018 and before has prepared me to enter 2019.  Each year of my life since 2015 has literally gotten better and better.  Mind you I didn’t say perfect and peachy but God has a way of helping me see things through His lens and it looks promising.

Last month I was reflecting back on my life. I have every reason to dread the holiday season and for many many years I did.  I lost my dearly loved grandfather several months before the holiday over 20 years ago but life NEVER seemed the same.  I lost my loving Mother 10 years ago just days after definitely NEVER was the same.  Three years ago, I was diagnosed with breast cancer and had surgery two weeks before Christmas, WOW!!  So when I look at those situations I could easily be depressed, feel hopeless and just wish the season would pass away while I slept.  But God’s saving grace said otherwise…He wouldn’t let me succumb to these feelings of despair and emptiness.

Living a saved Christian life is teaching me where my source of joy and happiness reside.  Although life threw and continues to throw swings at me, God is ALWAYS on my side telling me when to duck, dodge, get up or step aside.  He is showing me HIs love for me will carry me through any situation all I have to do is: rejoice always, pray without ceasing and be thankful in every situation…MY GOD-Goals for 2019 and beyond (toy story, lolol).  Sounds hard to do but I’m learning practice makes perfect (as perfect as I can get).  I can truly say my good days out weigh my bad days and greater is ahead of me….not only in eternity but here on earth.

I choose to believe in God and His goals for me!!  No time for looking back and stressing.  My life experiences were stepping stones for my right now and next.

What God-goals are you setting for your life….not just 2019 but beyond?!

Be Blessed Always!!